the wetness on my face is strange in contrast to the burning in my chest, rage bubbling in my chest does nothing to ease to blurring in my eyes as my body shakes in effort to stand, to smile.
I feel everything…every muscle tensing to maintain balance as words slur passed my lips. I didn’t know it was december until it was the 4th. I didn’t know the days, or the hours, my body ruled by the sounds of alarms and starting cars.
Voices filled my ears, keeping me awake as I numbly navigated streets, only to forget how I even reached my destination.
Terror clung to my ribcage at the flutter of eyelids. I downed chemicals that pushed my heart to pump harder, it becoming sore from the constant drumming against unrelenting bone.
I shook, unaware of the cold because I forgot what the sun felt like, and did you ever notice how blurry the moon is?
when I laid down, my eyes wouldn’t close. Oblivion mocked me as I stared until I had an hour left, and my eyes closed long enough for the alarm to sound, and I shook, unaware.
i hate you…as i stare at your name causing noise in my once silent room. when did i nail those blankets over the windows? something cold settled into my stomach as i brought your name to my ear.
Clothes inside out, half-frozen bagels eaten followed by more chemicals, and a grunt when the voices told me it was the 18th.
Words pushed out of my fingers to tell the world something, except the pain in my chest from the bruise forming underneath the cage. The black and blue matches the wet stains caused by something dripping from my cheek.