Le sigh….I miss Ireland every single day. Clean slate…no Drama-Llamas…

And no having to read every single day about another politician thinking they have a right, and privilege, to talk about and/or decide what I can or cannot do with my body. Can we just be brutally honest here with all that ridiculous-ness? I don’t even want to vote in the upcoming election because there is no lesser evil right now amongst the candidates vying for the race.

However, recent ridiculousness over the issues of women’s health and abortion has left me scratching my head. And now here is my obligatory controversial topic warning, today’s topic is women’s health and abortion. These are simply my perspectives, and as such they change overtime. However, I want to start a dialogue, and what better way than to discuss how insane I think my fellow countrymen and women have become…seriously…just saying. I think they have lost their minds…and here is some thoughts as to why I think this way on this specific topic:

Number 1: What I decide to do with my body is my decision. I think it is insane and illogical for someone who is not me to have any say over my body. My decision towards my body has no actual impact on anyone else in this world besides myself. If I decide to tattoo every inch of my skin, it will not change your life. When that idiot from Jackass decided to pierce his butt-cheeks together, his decision had absolutely no effect (affect…effect?) on my life. So, for anyone to even dare to try to tell me what I can, or cannot do, in regards to my body is absurd.

Number 2: I am more than 99.9999999999999999999999999 percent sure that all people who are “pro-choice” (imagine air-quotes here), are pro-life. Actually, I hate both terms, because one represents lack of freedom and respect, and the other represents pure ignorance. How do I better explain this perspective? I am pro-life. I am against murderers, and rapists, and the lot. I’m for women getting the right to decide what is best for their life, what is best for their personal standard of living. Do I think a fetus is a person? No, I really don’t think I do…there are some humans who I question if they are people…but that is irrelevant. Rhetoric is a slippery slope. Now I know the rhetoric, “a fetus is a person” has been used in the anti-abortion arena, but I have little care for this rhetoric because it minces opinion. For me, once a fetus becomes capable of surviving outside of the womb, then I can see it as a person. This issue delves into 3rd or late-term abortions, and I won’t go there today because I’m now getting a headache….anyway the point is…”pro-choice” people aren’t anti-life…dig it?

Number 3:  A woman has full rights to her body…the same way a man does. I understand that women deal with a little more than a man does (because heeeey I’m a woman). We have a lot more to pay attention to in regards to personal health and reproduction. So I fully believe the issues of abortion, sexual reproduction, and health, should be universally dealt with on an individual basis. I don’t mean as exceptions either. Women in Alaska deserve the respect, and health care, as women in Maine. That means access to birth control, health education, and reproduction health care. I mean…we do live in a country that loves to boast about the freedoms it citizens have fought for right?

Number 4: If you are against abortion…don’t get one. I know it seems like a childish response, and slightly clichéd, but it is truly that simple. You don’t have to agree with me, or even like me, but that disagreement doesn’t give you any right to deny me access to procedures and/or health practices…especially if you are a guy. I could understand this conversation with a woman, this disagreement. But why is it deemed acceptable for anyone else besides the woman in question to decide what she can do, or can’t do, with her body? Which leads too…

Reason 5: I understand, with a clarity that some people don’t have, that having a girlfriend, a wife, lover etc…who is getting an abortion can be troubling, and damaging, to a man. That is his child. Many men are not deadbeats; they are responsible, and loving. They are losing a part of themselves as well. It is a conversation both sides need to have, and both men and women should have access to information, and assistance, from trained professionals, in dealing with that situation. But it shouldn’t be forced. If a woman doesn’t want to hear the heartbeat, or see the ultrasound, or have a description, it shouldn’t be forced. And, as much as this statement is going to simply suck, even though a guy may want to follow through with the pregnancy…they don’t have to go through actual physical changes and the stress of pregnancy. I’m sorry guys, I really am…I wish there was another way, and for that I am truly sorry.

Reason 6:  Everyone knows what happens as a result of an abortion, and if you don’t please look up the definition. A woman going in for an abortion knows the outcome. The education I am speaking about is along the lines of the risk to the woman, information and assistance with dealing with the aftermath both mentally, physically and emotionally, and further health care practices and information to prevent another pregnancy before the woman is ready, if she is ever ready.

Reason 7: I find it hilarious that birth control lain solely on the woman’s shoulders. I was reading about Rush Limbaugh’s rant against the student who wanted to speak to Congress, and I was shocked…not at his words because I hear them all the time, but at the lack of recourse aside from losing adverts. The discourse amongst men in power in regards to women’s health has degraded to drunken bar talk that, in bars, leaves men labeled as useless pigs and completely undesirable. But these men are on TV, they are running for political office or already hold office, and are over the radio waves. My newest favorite quote is “just close your eyes” in regards to the mandatory ultrasound, that I don’t care if it is external or not, is invasive towards any woman. Ohh what about “put aspirin between your knees” that one had me laughing…why is it the woman’s fault for getting pregnant? Takes two people the last time I checked….but let’s go with the following scenario that has been implied shall we…

Contraceptives, like the pill, are now considered abortion pills and/or are not covered under medical insurances (especially religious ones), and since women still don’t make the same as men, many are unable to afford them on their own so women have to rely on cheaper forms like condoms. Condoms aren’t always fool-proof, but it is the woman’s responsibility, so it is her fault if it fails. Well, since this isn’t 100% guaranteed, than the woman should simply not have sex. There problem solved.

Because, as you are all aware, women are not human, and therefore are not subjected to the troubling sexual impulses that drive men crazy, but are acceptable in regards to men because they simply cannot help it…it is who they are….why would you even dare to tell a man to simply not have sex?

Reason 8:  Society is so terrified of female sexuality that it now is just hilariously stupid. I don’t get it…I’ll admit it, I think about sex often. I love sex…scratch that…I love good sex…my last relationship the sex was eh…but sex is good when done right…Why do I have to “control” myself simply because I am a woman? Why is it that we still exist in a culture that basis worth on a sexual organ? Anyone else find it ridiculous that, depending upon a person’s “junk” as the term has been as of late, they are immediately judged, categorized and slotted into social norms that NOOOBOOODDYYY can truly explain the origin of?

Chew on that one…

Reason 9: Contraceptives are actually used for something other than what they are called….they help regulate hormones, assist women with severe reproductive issues such as cancer, cysts, menstruation etc. So here we have a medication that does more than prevent pregnancy, it betters a woman’s standard of life….What does Viagra do besides help a guy get it up? (Sildenafil citrate, which Viagra is made of, is also used for Pulmonary Hypertension, but it’s actually called Revatio in that use and has different dosages and forms). See…education…but Reason 9 won’t ever be brought up in a legitimate conversation because it has no bearing on the facts that abortion and/or preventing pregnancies are just wrong (I think I spilled some of my sarcasm on the floor.)

Reason 10:  Goes back to reason 1 people. Yea I gave you my abridged opinion, and I recognize my own flaws and the arguments against my opinion….but we come full circle with this…my opinion does not dictate your life. In my opinion, women have the right to their bodies, end of story. You may not think it is moral, ethical, ideal, what-have you, and there are women who abuse the systems put in place to help them…thus causing this giant mess. Nonetheless, you don’t have any right to my body. I have a right to know about how my body works, about what getting an abortion would mean to my life, and how it would impact my body. I have every right to make the decision to keep, or end, my pregnancies. Does my having 3 piercings and 4 tattoos impact your decision on what to eat for breakfast? Does my having relationships with a man, or a woman, stop you from getting married? If I was pregnant, would my decision to keep or abort my pregnancy, stop you from having a child of your own, or adopting?

I want the people running for public offices to answer those questions for me…How does what I do in my life change theirs? Someone explain to me because I must be stupid. It doesn’t mean I am against a person having his/her own personal moral/ethical opinion. Ethics, like rhetoric, a veerrryyy slippery slope…but I didn’t know Mitt Romney, or Rick Santorum, existed until they decided to run for office…so why are my bedroom activities, and personal decisions in regards to my sexual identity and reproductive health, on their agendas to begin with?

But what do I know? I’ll just go burn a few bras and hang out with my friendly “femi-nazis” hating on the men while promoting deviant lifestyles that threaten the very moral fabric of our existence. Because…as you should very well know…that working to be an honest, and accepting individual who simply wants to find love and happiness makes me a social deviant.

I know… I am no better because of the mocking, but did I mention the insomnia?

I say we just smack the crap out of all politicians and go get a drink. I have found it quite easy to socialize with someone who disagrees with me on many topics. I actually have a few people I completely adore, and we don’t agree on much, one being my co-worker with whom I get into trouble with because we spend hours talking instead of working. She doesn’t support gay marriage, amongst other things we do not agree upon…but I consider her a friend. Her opinion won’t stop me from marrying a woman, and I doubt I would see her protesting at my wedding. Actually…I see her getting her drink on with my extremely Republic Uncle and Grandmother, which is more terrifying to me than a gay-marriage ban.

I guess what I am saying is that it is great to disagree with people on all sorts of topics. I disagree with thousands of people in regards to civil rights, women’s rights, gay rights, if the sky is actually blue, but that is how a country grows with each other. The USA is an overarching community that is littered with smaller ones, but as a whole we are all citizens of this country and responsible for discussing heated topics, and for getting into debates where we disagree until our throats are raw. I don’t care if my neighbors are Satan worshippers, or hippies, or republicans, or democrats, I have too much going on my life to really care what anyone else is doing in their personal life. I mean…I have helped my friend with her drug addiction, and have told my brother what I thought about his skinny jeans, but like I said…rhetoric…slippery slope. I don’t judge my friend for getting into drugs, although it made me sad, and when she needed my help I was there. I do judge my brother for his skinny jeans, but that is because only I am allowed to tease my brother’s chicken legs.

Now I’m just babbling…insomnia sucks. Le sigh…

This is just my hole-y, and sometimes flawed opinion….It just sucks to know that people truly think they have a right to dictate what goes on between my legs. They don’t live there, or live my life…what the hell do they know about me that gives them an informed perspective to impact my life?

Okay I’m done ranting….now back to our regularly scheduled insanity.

ps… I got a snickers bar today at work, because I wasn’t paying for the food they call food here, and the bar had this promotion for FeedingAmerica.org, where if you text the bar code of the snickers bar they will donate 2 meals to the program. So I did, and this was the text I got back,

“That was a kind, noble, and awesome thing to do.”

Kinda brightened up my day.

Question of the day:

Do you believe in yourself?